One of my favorite people in one of my favorite places to be in the world.
Watching my closest best friends fall in love is the hardest, saddest, and loneliest feeling in the entire world. As much as I feel left out and miserable about it, I can’t wish them any ill will because I love them so much and their happiness means the world to me. I wish they could just see how upset and singled out I feel. It’s like I am missing out on the best secret ever told.
Actually, I go see a psychologist and we talk about everything.
Today, I was mentioning to her that I have been cursing the gods and my family and friends who have passed away. I was mad at them because they are supposed to be watching over me, helping me in whatever way they can. At least that is what I was brought up to believe, that your friends and family who have passed on are watching over you. I told my psychologist that I feel like they aren’t and I’m missing out. It’s making me very upset when I think about it, or when I am crying and begging them to help me in whatever way they can. I always feel like I never get an answer, like I am forgotten by them.
But just a few minutes ago I was on facebook, doing nothing really. Clicking around between chapters of Pride and Prejudice and Zombies. I went to my profile page and right under where is says Friends (410) I saw my friend Kristi’s picture at the very top. I always assume those people who are on the side were the last people to have looked at your profile. Whether it is true or not… I feel like I got a tiny answer today. Maybe I am not so forgotten after all.
Fuck that! Hogwarts is soooooooooo a word! Stupid game.
Friends.
